Insomnia biting at my brain, picking me apart silently, I cant control my thoughts long enough to sleep well. Even when I do manage to sleep, I don't escape. My thoughts run unbound to do as they will. against me.
So I hide.
I am an insomniac on purpose these days because I cant fend of these nightmares and I'm too weak to do anything different. I wake up, hands quivering, stomach heaving, eyes clenched so tight it begins to hurt, far gone with too many tears to keep track. My pillows are saltly soaked and smeared with cosmetics from the previous night. My shirt is bunched up against my cold clammy skin, I cant get myself to pull it down.
I had something worse than a nightmare.
I dreamt you didnt exist.
but it cant be true, because I cant exist without you."Xk
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